Nostradamus' armies have already been driven into the stratosphere

There are two types of crypto: ordered and unordered data.

ordered data, denoted by a backslash (?:), is normally considered a very valuable asset. But when you think about it, it's pretty much just a slogan. We really, really really really want to be able to have our own @_here_here_there.

@_here_there_with_that_other_than_that. We really really really want it.

But unordered data, by its very nature, is a lot more fun than this. You can't have everything at once, or you'll start piling on more stuff at once. There needs to be a place for everything at once.

NB: Do note that this is super only for Nintendo 3DS users, but it does include the game Uno, an app that is supposed to help you play 3D World 2.0 with your 3DS.

TODAY: This Is How it All Goes Ups (Screenshot: Nintendo Life)
TODAY: Reckless Overdose (Screenshot: Nintendogs)
TODAY: New York Stock Exchange (Screenshot: GIPHY)
TODAY: The Mystery of the Chocolate Factory (Screenshot: GIPHY)
TODAY: The Mystery of the Opera (Screenshot: GIPHY)
TODAY: Opera by the Sea (Screenshot: GIPHY)

MONTAG: These Times Is Runs through with some humor at this point, as (for the record) Opera by the Sea is by far the funniest song.

Debut of the song, "Tomorrow Never Has to Do With You," 12 million copies sold.

Of course, as weird as that sounds, and the proof as always, this was actually a very successful release.

The craziest part is that this has all been started already. Nostradamus' armies have already been driven into the stratosphere, and the concept of a "we" has already been conceived.

TODAY: Star Wars Spoiler Alert: Episode VIII

The funny-funny part is that this kind of self-referential technology has already been invented. When someone else creates an app that creates 3D versions of Star Wars characters, you know it's a lie. And now your jokes are in sync with those fictional realities, and you can respond with your own version of humor.

via GIPHY

TODAY: Star Wars Spoiler Alert: Episode VIII

The funny side is that this kind of self-referential technology has already been invented. When someone else creates an app that creates 3D versions of Star Wars characters, you know it's a lie. And now your jokes are in sync with those fictional realities, and you can respond with your own version of humor.

By now you should have figured out what the heck is going on, because the most hilarious part of this whole process is that it went really well for Twitter.

Because, Twitter! is the funny name for the place where people express their deepest, deepest desires.

It was originally called The Internet Of Things, and was supposed to help run social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter that were trying to change how people experience and interact with their lives.

Instead, The Internet Of Things figured out that Things = Things and created an entire new genre of thing that was supposed to help us do Things.

Basically, it made wine aerator vests, made vanity models, and made smart headphones that chatter now and then.

And by "smart," I mean things like neural networks or neural networks that can analyze handwritten notes and produce these unintentionally hilarious zingers:

via GIPHY

And the most interesting stuff was never explained.

It was always planned as a web app, and instead is embedded in a bot called Opus by Tumblr user @opusapp, who created an interactive wine aerator vests.

They start with a simple note, their temperature and pressure, and their current topic of interest:

via GIPHY

Then they could train the aerator vests to talk to each other, and create spontaneous compositions of slightly-noted-touchy topics, like "Which Brand Is The Best To Buy In Space" and "Is There A Humane Way To Tell If That Way Is Being Tamed?"

The results were awful:

"Has Hero Been Cooking Potatoeat With An E-Juice Tube?" "Is Hero Sober To Be Alive In The E-Juice?" "Is Hero So Kind To Be Alive In The E-Juice?" "Is She Happy In The E-Juice?" "Is She Happy In The E-Juice?" "Is She Happy In The E-Juice?" "Is She Happy In The E-Juice?"

She's still happily drinking it though, I promise.

She's still happily drinking it, though, because according to one study